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The Art Of Seduction:
"The Human "Mating Dance"


he art of seduction is one of those topics which carries some moral taint in the minds of quite a few people. They see it as being somehow unsavory, as if sex is something "dirty" and the art of seduction involves tricking a woman into doing something that she doesn't want to do.

But that's simply not the case.

Sex is a natural, normal part of life

It can also be among the most enjoyable aspects of life if you do it right. And women have an even greater orgasmic capacity than men.

After all, very few women die of old age with their virginity still intact. And that's not because none of them wanted to have sex but instead had been skillfully worn down by the relentless, clever patter of lotharios.

the art of seduction as viewed by our gender
The art of seduction as
viewed by our gender

Most women like sex. They want sex. They just don't want sex with every guy. Instead, they want an above-average man … if they can attract one.

So how do women decide which man (or men) to sleep with? They hold what are effectively "job interviews" by interacting with prospective partners over one or many "sessions"... and then making their decision as to which one(s) to sleep with.

For discussion purposes, we'll consider the time frame between meeting someone new and bedding them as being "the seduction phase". After all, the art of seduction is nothing more than the process of showing the other person that you're a worthy and/or desirable bed-mate, and so the seduction process continues until you succeed … or until one of you decides to withdraw or refuse the other's overtures.

In that sense, the art of seduction is an entirely natural process. It's the equivalent of mating dances which some insects and birds engage in to demonstrate their fitness when wooing a potential mate.

Can the process be gamed?

Sure, almost anything in life can be gamed -- including real job interviews! When you've been called in for a job interview …

  • Do you wear your best outfit (freshly pressed, of course!), are your shoes freshly shined, your grooming impeccable?
  • Do you pay close attention to your posture, being careful not to slouch?
  • Have you read up on that company so that you can seem really interested in working there?
  • Do you laugh at the interviewer's jokes, even the lame ones?
  • Have you scripted and practiced good answers to the sorts of questions they're likely to ask you?
  • Will you tell them that your goal in life is to work for them … even if it isn't?

Sure you will. You're trying to accentuate the positive and hide any negatives. That's the way the hiring game is played, so you'll be at a real competitive disadvantage if other interviewees play that game and you don't.

And since every applicant does play that game ...

It all balances out in relative terms

Imagine a company wanting to hire the applicant with the highest IQ which asked each applicant about his or her IQ score.

  • If each applicant added 20 to their real score, the applicant who had the highest actual IQ would still get selected.
  • But if some of the applicants gave their real IQs (without embellishment), those honest applicants end up at a relative disadvantage as the employer would be mentally adjusting each self-reported IQ downward by 20 points to compensate for "apple polishing".

“… some guys are totally honest and that usually knocks them out of the running …”

The art of seduction works similarly. Every participant (both male and female) tries to show his or her own best side and while hiding any weak points.

Will they ever lie? Absolutely! That's part of the game for both genders. But just as with job interviews, it normally balances out in relative terms.

The exception is that some guys are totally honest and that usually knocks them out of the running. Women will assume that each man is showing only his best side and therefore, if that's his best side, the "real him" must be truly dismal. And so they'll turn him down.

So approach the art of seduction for what it is: the relationship equivalent of job interviews. Women set the ground rules, so your role is to play the game the way you're expected.

Continue to our main Seduction page to

learn more about the art of seduction.