Can A "Nice Guy"
t's not easy for most guys to seduce women because most guys don't understand them. We take women at face value: if you ask them what they're looking for in a man, they'll say "a nice guy" (which is exactly what you are) and yet you'll nearly always strike out anyway.
What gives? Is the old saying ("nice guys finish last") really true?
To an extent, yes
Many women do seem
attracted to "bad boys"
And that makes some sense from an evolutionary standpoint. After all, many of the dominant figures in history have been tyrants who lived by the sword: power was not given, it was taken.
How to seduce women
without being this loser
So if you're an average guy, does that mean you have to transform yourself into a jerk (or worse) to seduce women successfully?
Not necessarily. That's one approach to try, and many guys do get better results from doing so. But it's common for those guys to find the exercise not fully satisfying. They'll be able to seduce women more successfully by playing the "jerk" role but they won't enjoy being a jerk. It's just not "them".
Fortunately, you don't need to adopt the full "bad boy" persona to seduce girls more easily. As it turns out, there are certain aspects of that "role" which account for the favorable seduction effect. Therefore, changing just those elements of your approach enables you to seduce women more easily ... and still be able to look at yourself in the mirror and see a decent human being looking back at you.
The difference between "nice guys"
and "bad boys"
One of the biggest differences between "nice guys" and "bad boys" is that the nice guys come across as being afraid of women and the bad boys don't. Afraid of what? That she won't like him.
So when most "nice guys" try to seduce women, they'll "walk on eggshells" in hopes of not upsetting her. After all, if he does upset her in some way, she might reject him and that will (he thinks) blow his chances of eventually getting her into bed.
But fearful, timid guys tend not to be wildly successful with women. His insecurity will mark him as an unworthy bedmate.
it's enough to simply disagree with her on a point (or two or three) during your conversation
But that doesn't mean that you have to be verbally abusive to her to demonstrate that you're not afraid of her. It's enough to simply disagree with her on a point (or two or three) during your conversation. Because of fear, most nice guys won't do that.
One important caution, though: it's okay to disagree with opinions she expresses but not with feelings she expresses. The former will improve your chances of scoring with her but the latter can often reduce your chances.
And the two categories sometimes overlap so it can take some skill to differentiate between the two. If she starts a statement with "I think that
", it's usually an opinion. And if she starts a statement with "I feel that
" she's expressing a feeling. But what if she does neither?
Fortunately, there's a deft way for you to hedge your bets by disagreeing only with the opinion part of what she just said but not also challenging her underlying feelings: "I see it differently."
At that point, all you need do is to briefly explain why you see the issue differently.
If you're looking to
learn more about how to seduce women, continue to the main Seduction page.